I'm a transhumanist, first and foremost, ok.
The Rise of the Planet of the Apes, currently unreleased, looks like it will be the worst movie of the year, if not the worst ever made.
First, the very premise of the movie is retarded. And yes, I am describing the very basic idea of the movie( Super smart apes rise up against and begin to supplant humans as the apex species on Earth, I guess) as the mentally deficient spawn of an incestuous union between closely related family members.
A geneticist could engineer a chimp with the charisma of Che Guevarra, the intelligence of Stephen Hawking, and the tactile mind of Sun Tzu, release it into the wild, and what would you end up with? A pissed off Ape who realizes he(or she) would have to breed with EVERY OTHER CHIMPANZEE IN EXISTENCE until the day they died to even make a bump in the genetic pool of the species. Even then, if you round up every single member of the great ape family, negating humans, you might end up with the average population of a city in Arkansas.
Next, let's just assume this army of a hundred thousand chimps gets loose in any American city. Let's say New York City, to be fun. What would happen then? Assuming a group of poorly trained National Guard didn't simply mow down the throng with their M-16's, ALL THE REDNECKS IN THE COUNTRY WOULD BEGIN TO GUFFAW simultaneously as PETA and every tree-hugger group gets their heads smashed in by the very animals they had so recently championed("But chim-chim, I love y-"cru-unch of a cracked skull).
After that, you would witness a demographic shift not seen since the carpet-bagger migration to the South following the Civil War, as all those hunters that "high society" looks down their noses at converge upon the besieged city and display why we- h. Sapiens Sapien- are king of the hill, and even super smart chimps are just that, super smart chimps. Let's see a monkey dodge the bullet fired from a 30-.06 half a mile away. And, oh, wait, the monkey saw the trip wire connected to that claymore? Press a button and you still have orangutan-marmalade.
The originals aren't even that entertaining, and even the new one with that awesome actor, Mark Walberg(excuse me as I vomit into a paper sack), sucked. This film will take its place among the numerous expensive failures released this year, and be forgotten completely except by those guys who have home-made PotA costumes at home.
That's not the worst thing. Movies like this cast genetic engineering, medical advancement, and, vicariously, transhumanism, in a terrible light. Yes, there may be those who have ethical disagreements with some methods associated with the aforementioned advancements, but BIG PHARMA, the U.S. Government, and many other organizations don't tell you that they capitalized from the research done by Nazi scientists. But they did. I don't hear anyone griping about the ethics of that.
Back on subject: If you're an H+, you should boycott this movie due to it's degradation of the view of the pursuit of advancement. Everyone else should just ignore the film altogether, cuz I don't wanna hear your moanin and groanin as you regret spending the money seeing/buying/renting this piece of cinematic garbage. Anyway, Hollywood, you should be ashamed of yourself. If the world REALLY wanted to watch vomit from the past, I have this brown bag right here. Sell it to ya for a million dollars.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhh, and the worst part is that the chimp is made smarter by a DRUG. At best it would only effect the animal for a short time unless the animal suddenly developed the ability to manufacture pharmaceuticals. And we all know, from watching the precursors, that in a few thousand years, the apes are about as evolved technologically as we were before the dark ages. So, if this were to happen, a bunch of smart monkeys would run around for a week before going back to poking anthills with sticks. This is great, lol.
ReplyDeletemoved from Transhumanfreedom.com, posted by xxReeDxx
ReplyDeleteThe movie was THAT bad, but not for the reasons mentioned.
What made the movie so bad was its depiction of so-called scientists and their management. It was so ridiculous it make me ill. "I know, I'll take an experimental virus home and give it to my ailing father!" or "I know, I'll keep an evolved chimpanzee in my attic and take him out to the forest from time to time, ain't I brilliant!"
As far as the "drug", it actually makes some sense, it is not really a drug per se, but a virus that "corrects" the defective genome. Obviously results would not be instantaneous as they were with the new and improved version released on the primate population, but it would be noticeable within a few weeks.
There is also understandable confusion concerning the end of the movie. It was more similar to 12 Monkeys than the previous Planet of the Apes films. The virus that is developed has positive effects on all primates except for humans, to whom it is deadly. The virus "goes viral" and kills off a vast majority of the human population (and presumably leaving those that survive to have limited intelligence and an inability to speak or otherwise communicate effectively). The other primates quickly evolve as the result of the virus and inherit the world that homo sapiens left behind.
The one thing I like is the fact I was right about this movie being an unrealistic, steaming pile of crap.
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